The Problem with Fear
One of the great misunderstandings in Judaism today revolves around the concept of Yira — often translated as “fear of God.” Sadly, for many people, the idea of fearing God conjures up images of punishment, threats, and terror. But how can that be? Judaism teaches us to love God, to bond with Him, to long for closeness. How can you possibly love and seek to bond with Someone you are terrified of? You don’t want to get close to someone you’re scared of — you want to run away. This misunderstanding doesn’t just distort Judaism; it blocks the very purpose of our journey — connection with the Divine.
True Yira: Fear of Separation, Not Fear of Harm
The Nesivos Shalom makes this point very powerfully: the common understanding of Yira — as being scared, threatened, or frightened — literally contradicts the entire movement of Judaism. Judaism is about coming closer to Hashem, not pulling away out of fear. Real Yira is not about being afraid that God will hurt us. It’s about being afraid of acting in ways that will alienate us from Him. It is a fear born from love — a fear of losing the most precious connection we have. Rabbi Tzadok HaKohen explains this beautifully: God is never trying to hurt us. Hashem is always trying to heal us. The fear we are meant to experience isn’t fear of being hit; it’s the fear of getting lost. It’s the fear of living disconnected from the Source of life, meaning, and joy. When we realize that Yira is about cherishing and protecting our bond with God, it changes everything.
The Roots of Our Misunderstanding
Many of us unknowingly project onto God the image of the authority figures we grew up with. Parents are often our first experience of authority, judgment, and, unfortunately, fear. It’s only natural that many people transfer those feelings onto God. But God is not just another “parent figure” with a bigger stick. God is infinite love, infinite healing, and infinite light. He is not standing over you with a club, waiting for you to mess up. He is constantly reaching out, offering connection, offering closeness. Understanding this is a major shift. It opens the door for a relationship based on love, trust, and awe, rather than fear and anxiety.
The Transformative Power of True Yira
When you realize that Yira means awe — the awe of losing closeness, the awe of damaging a sacred bond — it transforms your entire relationship with God. You are no longer living out of fear of punishment; you are living out of a deep yearning for connection. Judaism isn’t about keeping score; it’s about keeping close. The mitzvot, the prayers, the spiritual practices — they are not ways to appease an angry deity but ways to hold onto the closeness you already have with Hashem. The real question is not, “Am I afraid enough of punishment?” but rather, “Am I in awe of the incredible relationship I’ve been gifted with — and how much do I treasure it?”
From Fear to Freedom
The ultimate goal of Judaism is not fear-driven compliance but love-driven closeness. True Yira empowers you to live with awe, sensitivity, and gratitude for your connection with Hashem. When we shed our projections and misunderstandings, we can finally approach God with an open heart — not because we are scared of what will happen if we don’t, but because we cannot bear the thought of losing Him. That is the Yira that Judaism calls us to embrace. And that is the path to real freedom, real love, and real spiritual life.
